Wounded Healer

Theres a boy with pancreatic mass in my ward.. who has multiple other issues going on because of the tumour.. a most pleasant cooperative boy … I look at him as one of those rare interesting cases. .. he listens to us unflinching as we discuss him standing overhead ..like hes a specimen and cant hear us.. then I click his pictures from different angles.. he and his parents listen silently when I tell them he has a tumor and will need surgery… I of course continue our routine after we reveal this devastating news to the family, not sparing an extra thought for him Nonetheless, he greets me with a smile every day .. waiting for me to tell him whats next I find out that the tumor looks malignant … but only my curiosity is piqued.. not my sympathy … I read some more about the case preparing to write it up as soon as I get a chance Much later at night the childs accepting smiling face and his parents expressions – hope tinged with fear .. come to my mind … and I feel like cry...

Just when I was losing my interest in  human kind  with all of the dead weight around me I came across this  incredible   person  .. .. a Tour de Force .. an endocrinologist par  excellence… And in my eyes a burst of energy, a  magician . She has infectious positive energy , a tendency to include and make a family of people who work with her .   An active defiance of negative forces of all nature  " Frustration must not enter my doors “ being her motto.     A glow of enthusiasm and youth emanates from her being at the age of 68 that translates to everyone coming in contact with her ..   A reservoir of creative energy .... her intelligence and superior knowledge of the subject enhanced by her enthusiasm to continue learning .   An empathetic listener .. Her disarming smile for each patient .. with the special cooing for the kids .. putting everyone from an infant to an old person at ease and invoking a feeling ...

Euthanasia Sometimes suffering is as inevitable as it is unfortunate.. I have seen families suffering as their kin battles a debilitating incurable or progressive medical condition. Every person has a right to live, but if that living is reduced to breathing through a tube and swallowing food through a pipe, is that acceptable? Or instances where an active ticking mind is trapped inside a lifeless body .. an excruciating state to imagine.. Are we stubbornly prolonging suffering for the patient and financial burden and mental angst for the family ? Humankind has been manipulating nature for a very long time now, but death is as inevitable as life and our attempt to play God by physicians back fires in more ways than one. If we try to fight nature to this extent, we will pay a huge price for sure. Survival of the fittest is the law of nature. Sometimes I think, it is ok to accept, to let nature take its course and let go. Medicine is a rational science, but life and death isn’t...

The day you were born I can never forget the first look you gave me .. you looked terrified and pink ..your papa stood nearby and looked a bit worried as you forced your way out and then a slow smile lit up his face when you wailed to your hearts content.. I was almost passing out from the strain I asked him .. n he said “he” . and I knew you would be a boy ever since you were in my tummy  😊 Id always thought of you as my little monkey when you were kicking inside me .. imagined you somewhat vague and there you were looking just like I had imagined .. and an uncanny resemblance to the poster baby I looked at all the while during pregnancy. We were confused when you cried the first day and waiting for you to pee  … then you wet papa’s shirt .. BTW your papa slept like a log that night as if he had gone through labour and not me   Just holding and carrying you was scary you were so tiny .. but so adorable.. no one could take their eyes off you. Your ...